Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

You know the drill..

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badmoonrising
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Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#1 Post by badmoonrising » Thu Apr 05, 2012 6:03 am

The Official BMR christening ceremony.

Requirements:

1. Boat.
2. Captain.
3. First Mate (if ok with topless women, otherwise let her go shopping).
4. Topless women (King Neptune loves topless women).
5. Booze.
6. Your closest friends, preferably one that can drink and speak at the same time, we'll call him "MC".


Ceremony:
(MC): "We now call on the Captain to Christen the new Vessel"
(Captain): "I name this vessel (name of the boat)"
(1st mate or designated topless woman): "May Neptune Bless her and all who sail with her"
(1st mate or designated topless woman): "May Neptune keep all who sail her safe"
(everyone): "Amen"

Topless women frolic about. Everyone drinks.

(MC): "A Toast to the Captain"
(everyone): "Cheers" (or other toast)
(MC): "A Toast to the (1st mate or designated topless woman) " . Usually, the larger breasted of the bunch.
(everyone): "Cheers!" (or other toast)
(MC): "A Toast to (name of the boat)"

Topless women frolic about. Everyone drinks.

(Captain): "A toast to everyone present! Thank you for coming today and in joining us in this very specially occasion!" Fairwinds to all!
(everyone): "Cheers!" (or other toast).

Topless women frolic about. Everyone continues to drink.


(Captain then takes his boat for a cruise for the first time, it is usually best that the Captain takes her out single handed, or with the topless women).



End of ceremony!

Do this and your vessel shall forever see fair winds and calm seas. :drink4 :thumbsup
Ed, Cheryl, Ethan and Aspen.
2013 Sun Tracker Party Barge 22 w/90 HP Mercury, "Hellrhighwater 2"
2014 E-350 Extended XLT.
Chesapeake City ,MD

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playcat
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#2 Post by playcat » Thu Apr 05, 2012 6:17 am

Sorry, but all I heard was...
"blah, blah, blah, topless women frolic about, blah, blah, topless women frolic about, blah,blah, topless women frolic about..."
Oh, NOW I get it.
Three cheers for tradition!!!!!
Can I change the name of my boat every week?????
playcat
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badmoonrising
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#3 Post by badmoonrising » Thu Apr 05, 2012 6:19 am

I figured this needed to be stickied. Don't want to upset Poseidon by not having boat owners not following proper protocol. :rofl :rofl
Ed, Cheryl, Ethan and Aspen.
2013 Sun Tracker Party Barge 22 w/90 HP Mercury, "Hellrhighwater 2"
2014 E-350 Extended XLT.
Chesapeake City ,MD

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brianD
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#4 Post by brianD » Sat Apr 07, 2012 5:00 pm

Isn't there something about renaming a boat that goes like this...

you drive the boat backwards and ask Neptune to remove the name of the boat from his records, and thank him for previous safe passages - Topless women back into all the men on board - and a bit of booze is poured into the water as an offering to Neptune - Topless women continue to back up and grind - simulating the erasure in Neptune's books - into the men till the boat is safely docked so the "naming" ceremony (as previously posted) can commence.
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badmoonrising
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#5 Post by badmoonrising » Sat Apr 07, 2012 8:54 pm

Works for me :thumbsup
Ed, Cheryl, Ethan and Aspen.
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2014 E-350 Extended XLT.
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#6 Post by Bamaman » Wed Apr 25, 2012 3:54 pm

The name of my boat is "De Bonte Koe", Dutch for The Spotted Cow. My family arrived April 15, 1660 on a sailing ship by that name.

There were no cows in my boat christening--or even topless heavy breasted women.
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#7 Post by REPETE » Fri May 11, 2012 11:00 am

playcat wrote:Sorry, but all I heard was...
"blah, blah, blah, topless women frolic about, blah, blah, topless women frolic about, blah,blah, topless women frolic about..."
Oh, NOW I get it.
Three cheers for tradition!!!!!
Can I change the name of my boat every week?????
:lol3 Me to.
Just verified it on Snopes. Liberals are complete mouth breathing idiots.

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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#8 Post by BobG » Mon May 14, 2012 1:28 pm

In the Celtic version, substitute Manannan mac Lir for Neptune, and triple the topless wimmin frolicking about, and I think it ought to work. :drink
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#9 Post by Oldsailor » Mon Jul 01, 2013 7:45 pm

Having recently purchased my 'toon from an elderly woman who knew nothing about naming boats,
I pondered over whether to let it slide, or appropriately put a fashionable name to her....after
consulting with my youngest son, and the bottle of British Navy Pusser's West Indies Rum; it
was decided to name her after my wife, and her love for the lake.

So, with bottle in hand, and our official British Navy painted tin drinking cup, we stood on the
fore deck, and christened her "Laura's Leisure" - being very careful not to spill (waste) any of
the rum on the carpet.

Following the ceremony, and while her namesake was busy ashore, young son (39) and I took
a turn around the lake in the newly christened 'toon.

She will be duly lettered in the next few weeks.

Lettering now done and applied:
Image

....and I've got to find a source for that rum....other than going back to Tortola .... :drink
Last edited by Oldsailor on Mon Aug 19, 2013 11:39 am, edited 1 time in total.
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It means you're a Pirate!"[/b] :drink

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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#10 Post by oldcoot » Thu Jul 04, 2013 11:54 am

Pretty neat, old sailor...I did the same....my son has a decal business..Deertrackdesigns.com....he did "the Jillie Marie" for me in old fashioned script....If anyone else wants complete name decals...look him up and tell him "Dad sent me"...I get nothing but I'm proud of him....
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#11 Post by FireEMT41 » Sun Jul 28, 2013 3:59 pm

*cue frolicking topless women* :bowdown
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#12 Post by mike » Fri Aug 23, 2013 1:36 pm

I need to rename my boat... Any suggestions?

I was watching the great outdoors last night and they had a boat called "Suck my wake" which I thought would be funny.

I was also thinking about "Please Start"??
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#13 Post by curtiscapk » Fri Aug 23, 2013 1:44 pm

mike wrote:I need to rename my boat... Any suggestions?

I was watching the great outdoors last night and they had a boat called "Suck my wake" which I thought would be funny.

I was also thinking about "Please Start"??

Agreed!

At least the Admiral named ours correctly.... Right now THE FLOATER can only float......

UNTIL NEXT WEEK HOPEFULLY!!
Craig and Paula
"THE FLOATER" rebuild Spring 2013
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#14 Post by HandymanHerb » Fri Aug 23, 2013 2:11 pm

Oldsailor wrote: ....and I've got to find a source for that rum....other than going back to Tortola .... :drink
Find you a good source for pure sugar cane juice and you can make your own at home, my nephew made a batch and it turned out real good and smooth
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Re: Christening ceremony - for new or changing a boat's name.

#15 Post by ezrollin » Fri Dec 27, 2013 9:52 am

Animals,you're all animals.....did you say topless women ?

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